Post by MERICA on Aug 20, 2023 6:52:45 GMT -5
“To say you’ve been an epic disappointment would be the understatement of the century Patriot.”
Fade in to reveal Wrestling Legend Chet Dakota pacing in front of a seated and dejected looking MERICA. As the camera zooms out we see MERICA seated in the front pew of a church while Chet paces on the altar.
How do we know he’s dejected under that mask? I don’t know but we just do. Either way Wrestling Icon and Billion Time champion Chet Dakota is in the midst of another one of his well known tirades in which he berates his student.
While some in the industry including MERICA’s team mate and Team TLS Savior Vhodka Black find Chet to be rude, unprofessional and generally a dick, MERICA appreciates the tough love. Even if it makes him feel dead inside.
“You entered these Trials with AMERICA on your side. With me on your side and what do you have to show for it after all these hours of training? 3 matches…no victories. Are you satisfied with this Patriot?”
“No I am not.”
“Good. Because if you were satisfied then our time as teacher and student would have come to an end. You have disappointed me Patriot. Disappointed me in ways I didn’t even know was possible. Disappointed me like a son. But not all hope is lost. You have a chance to earn some redemption next week when you face that whiny little bitch Thaddeus Duke and Matthew Knox, a guy who for some reason seems to have taken a liking to you. Why do you think that is Patriot?”
“Because I’m a nice guy?”
“Possibly but no. It’s because you are an easy mark Patriot. I have no doubt that Matthew Know looks at you as sees someone he can beat with one hand tied behind his back and both of his ankles broken. He sees a rookie that is so green he might as well just lay down and pretend to be grass so that he can be walked all over. That’s what Matt Knox thinks of you. And Thaddeus Duke? The self proclaimed greatest of everything ever? The guy who spends more time thirst tweeting than he does training to be a wrestler, do you know what he thinks of you?”
“Honestly? He strikes me as the kind of guy who doesn’t think about me at all. Thad seems like such a self absorbed egoist that I am at best an afterthought for him. While Matt Knox at least knows me and will give me some respect despite my record in these Trials, Thad won’t give me the time of day. And I’m ok with that because it’s while he’s ignoring me that I will get my chance to strike. While he is rightfully focusing on the more accomplished Matt Knox I will be lurking in the shadows just waiting for my shot to strike.”
“Very good Patriot. And how are you going to go about that?”
“By following your teachings to the letter.”
“Is that so? Cause it certainly doesn’t feel like you’ve been doing that so far. In fact you can’t possibly be because I’m a 50 time Champion and you’re about to lose your 50th match in a row…”
“I’ve only had…”
“50th. Match. In. A. Row. Patriot. If you were following my teachings to the letter you’d have won at best all 3 of your matches, at worst at least one of them but you have so far managed to do the truly unthinkable and that’s not win a single match yet. Even that Helena whack a doo has won a match.”
“Hey Helena is sweet. Leave her out of this.”
“See!!! That right there!!! That is your problem MERICA. You’re too God damn nice. AMERICA the beautiful never got anywhere in life by being nice. AMERICA got where it is by smashing people in the mouth and taking what it wanted from whoever they damn well pleased. It does not ask for permission or beg for forgiveness. AMERICA isn’t the greatest country on Earth because it was nice. AMERICA is what it is because it doesn’t give a shit what anyone else thinks. And maybe if you adopted the same fighting spirit that carried AMERICA to victory in the Revolutionary War, WW 1 and WW 2 you might be 3-0 instead of 0-2-1 which might as well be 0-3 because ties aren’t real except in regular season football and this ain’t that.”
“I don’t really know what to say Chet. I feel like I’ve let you down. Let the fans down. Let Momma MERICA down and let AMERICA down. How do I fix this?”
“I’m not sure you can Patriot. Now as currently constructed. I have offered you everything I have. Taught you everything I know and here we sit with you winless in 3 matches. The only way that I can think of to try and fix this, is to change how you operate in the ring. You need to abandon your code and adopt something more befitting of the situation you find yourself in currently?”
“And what is that?”
“Win at any and all costs?”
“You mean cheat?”
“There’s an old proverb from Richard Nixon: If you aren’t cheating you aren’t trying.”
“I don’t think Richard Nixon ever said that.”
“Of course he did Patriot. I wouldn’t have said he did if he didn’t. Now don’t question me again.”
“My apologies sir. You’re absolutely right. I was out of line. Please forgive me.”
“Think nothing of it. Now back to the point I was trying to make. You need to change the narrative Patriot. And you need to do it fast. You have no chance of being in the main event, of trying to obtain a piece of the Triad. You blew that but you can still at least try to go out with some momentum. You can try and change people’s minds because right now all they see is a future wash out. Do you want to be the only guy in the Trials who didn’t win a match or do you want to be the guy who decided to leave it all on the line and do whatever it takes to win.”
“But cheating?”
“Look Patriot I didn’t get to where I am today because I played by the rules all the time and I promise you this, no one who ever mattered in this life did so without fucking over someone along the way. That is not hyperbole, that is fact. You think your friend Vhodka is squeaky clean? Or LCP? Helena? Matt Knox? Thirsteus Duke? Strafford? There isn’t a single competitor in this event that hasn’t or isn’t willing to do whatever it takes to secure the W and it’s long past time that you do the same thing.”
“I don’t know if I can Chet.”
“You can. And you will. You can’t afford not to. Like I said already, you blew your shot of accomplishing anything in the Bravery trials but going out with a win will show the Powers That Be that you aren’t a quitter. That you, to borrow another sports idiom, play until the whistle blows. It will certainly help you when it comes time to re-up for the Bravery trials. Or do you want to go out on your back watching someone else win? Again?”
“I don’t want that.”
“Then you need to trust me and start doing things differently. Trust me Patriot. Just like George Washington, I can never tell a lie.”
“I believe you Chet. And I believe in you. From day one I have believed that you were the person who would take me to the top. None of that has changed as far as I’m concerned even if you are upset with me and think I’ve failed you and everyone else but I still believe in you and if this is what needs to be done then I guess…”
Suddenly the doors to the church swing open with a loud thud as the doors smash into the walls now behind them as a very angry, very well armed woman steps out of the shadows and into the light.
“YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!”
For there, standing in the doorway like an Angel sent down from the Heavens above stands MERICA’s teammate Vhodka Black, with a machete in her hand.
“Step aside MERICA. I’m doing this for you and for AMERICA!!!”
And with that Vhodka charges down the aisle towards Chet, Machete high in the air ready to inflict maximum damage. Chet’s eyes widen as he casually takes a step backwards. He opens the bible placed on the altar and then smashes a button that for some reason was placed inside of it. Just as he does this the building begins to shake violently which brings MERICA to his feet and Vhodka to a screeching halt only feet away from her intended victim. Dust and debris start to fall from the ceiling as the altar suddenly starts to pull away from the rest of the building and climb the sky as both Vhokda and MERICA look on in astonishment.
“Sorry Vhodka but Chet Dakota does not put aggressive hands on a woman.” Chet shouts as he looks down at the two wrestlers below him.
“Chet…where will I find you?” MERICA shouts up at his mentor.
“Don’t worry Patriot. I’ll find you.”
Vhokda looks up at Chet and mimics a throat slashing gesture with the machete to Chet as he flies away off into the distance on his flying altar.
“Are you ok MERICA?”
“Yes Vhodka I’m fine thank you. How did you know I was here?”
“I used the find your phone app.”
“But I don’t have a phone.”
“I used it on Chet’s phone.”
“Ahhhh, I see. But why?”
“Because MERICA, Chet has got to know. I know he’s your mentor and you like the guy but he’s the worst. The literal worst. No one likes him and I’m pretty sure he’s not a 50 time World Champion, among other outlandish claims that he makes. You can do better than him, MERICA. I know you can.”
“Maybe Vhodka. Maybe but he found me. He literally found me off the streets and offered to mentor me. I feel like I owe it to him to see this through.”
“I understand that friend. And I think your loyalty is something to be commended but take it from me. Someone who's been around this industry for a while. Most people are trash and not to be trusted. Chet is definitely one of those people. I’ll have your back as much as I can but keep your eyes open and your ears perked up.”
“Will do. Thanks Vhodka. You’ve been a real friend since day 1. Even before we were drafted to be on the same team. And you’ve stuck with me despite my repeated disappointments. I appreciate you.”
“Don’t mention it MERICA. You’re one of the good ones.” Vodka says as he pats MERICA on the back and then heads back out of the church, kindly closing the doors behind her as she leaves.
~~~~~
“Am I one of the good ones? Vhodka seems to think so and I genuinely believe that she believes it but what exactly does that mean? Why am I good? Is it because I try and keep my nose clean and not make waves? Is it because I take my mom to church every Sunday and then volunteer at the local soup kitchen? Is it because I try to adhere to a specific code both inside and outside of the ring? Maybe it’s one of those things, maybe it’s a combination of them or maybe it’s none of them. I suppose it doesn’t really matter though does it? In the context of these trials being one of the good ones means being the worst wrestler in this event. Maybe Chet is right. Maybe it is time for a change and maybe that change starts with my opponents this week.
Thaddeus Duke has accomplished so much at such a young age it truly is remarkable. I would say he’s someone to be envied but I don’t want his already enormous head to swell anymore lest he find himself floating away like Chet just did. I joke but i’m also serious. Thaddeus calls himself a Young Lion but he is also a Young Legend and he knows it and it is that arrogance that will ultimately be his undoing. If not by me then by someone like…
Matt Knox. As I said before Matt has been a pretty solid dude with me since I showed up on the scene, I really don’t have anything bad to say about the guy as much as I wished I could. Like Thad he too is extremely accomplished. He’s beat some of the very best this business has to offer, past and present.I’ve often gone into these matches telling everyone what my plan is and as you can see from the results it hasn’t worked out for me one bit so instead I’m just going to say this. As much as I hate to admit it Chet made a compelling case as to why I need to change things up and perhaps the thin red line that I've so far stayed on the right side of.
Maybe being one of the good ones is another way of saying you’re not very good at all.
OOC: Word count 2250 on the nose
Fade in to reveal Wrestling Legend Chet Dakota pacing in front of a seated and dejected looking MERICA. As the camera zooms out we see MERICA seated in the front pew of a church while Chet paces on the altar.
How do we know he’s dejected under that mask? I don’t know but we just do. Either way Wrestling Icon and Billion Time champion Chet Dakota is in the midst of another one of his well known tirades in which he berates his student.
While some in the industry including MERICA’s team mate and Team TLS Savior Vhodka Black find Chet to be rude, unprofessional and generally a dick, MERICA appreciates the tough love. Even if it makes him feel dead inside.
“You entered these Trials with AMERICA on your side. With me on your side and what do you have to show for it after all these hours of training? 3 matches…no victories. Are you satisfied with this Patriot?”
“No I am not.”
“Good. Because if you were satisfied then our time as teacher and student would have come to an end. You have disappointed me Patriot. Disappointed me in ways I didn’t even know was possible. Disappointed me like a son. But not all hope is lost. You have a chance to earn some redemption next week when you face that whiny little bitch Thaddeus Duke and Matthew Knox, a guy who for some reason seems to have taken a liking to you. Why do you think that is Patriot?”
“Because I’m a nice guy?”
“Possibly but no. It’s because you are an easy mark Patriot. I have no doubt that Matthew Know looks at you as sees someone he can beat with one hand tied behind his back and both of his ankles broken. He sees a rookie that is so green he might as well just lay down and pretend to be grass so that he can be walked all over. That’s what Matt Knox thinks of you. And Thaddeus Duke? The self proclaimed greatest of everything ever? The guy who spends more time thirst tweeting than he does training to be a wrestler, do you know what he thinks of you?”
“Honestly? He strikes me as the kind of guy who doesn’t think about me at all. Thad seems like such a self absorbed egoist that I am at best an afterthought for him. While Matt Knox at least knows me and will give me some respect despite my record in these Trials, Thad won’t give me the time of day. And I’m ok with that because it’s while he’s ignoring me that I will get my chance to strike. While he is rightfully focusing on the more accomplished Matt Knox I will be lurking in the shadows just waiting for my shot to strike.”
“Very good Patriot. And how are you going to go about that?”
“By following your teachings to the letter.”
“Is that so? Cause it certainly doesn’t feel like you’ve been doing that so far. In fact you can’t possibly be because I’m a 50 time Champion and you’re about to lose your 50th match in a row…”
“I’ve only had…”
“50th. Match. In. A. Row. Patriot. If you were following my teachings to the letter you’d have won at best all 3 of your matches, at worst at least one of them but you have so far managed to do the truly unthinkable and that’s not win a single match yet. Even that Helena whack a doo has won a match.”
“Hey Helena is sweet. Leave her out of this.”
“See!!! That right there!!! That is your problem MERICA. You’re too God damn nice. AMERICA the beautiful never got anywhere in life by being nice. AMERICA got where it is by smashing people in the mouth and taking what it wanted from whoever they damn well pleased. It does not ask for permission or beg for forgiveness. AMERICA isn’t the greatest country on Earth because it was nice. AMERICA is what it is because it doesn’t give a shit what anyone else thinks. And maybe if you adopted the same fighting spirit that carried AMERICA to victory in the Revolutionary War, WW 1 and WW 2 you might be 3-0 instead of 0-2-1 which might as well be 0-3 because ties aren’t real except in regular season football and this ain’t that.”
“I don’t really know what to say Chet. I feel like I’ve let you down. Let the fans down. Let Momma MERICA down and let AMERICA down. How do I fix this?”
“I’m not sure you can Patriot. Now as currently constructed. I have offered you everything I have. Taught you everything I know and here we sit with you winless in 3 matches. The only way that I can think of to try and fix this, is to change how you operate in the ring. You need to abandon your code and adopt something more befitting of the situation you find yourself in currently?”
“And what is that?”
“Win at any and all costs?”
“You mean cheat?”
“There’s an old proverb from Richard Nixon: If you aren’t cheating you aren’t trying.”
“I don’t think Richard Nixon ever said that.”
“Of course he did Patriot. I wouldn’t have said he did if he didn’t. Now don’t question me again.”
“My apologies sir. You’re absolutely right. I was out of line. Please forgive me.”
“Think nothing of it. Now back to the point I was trying to make. You need to change the narrative Patriot. And you need to do it fast. You have no chance of being in the main event, of trying to obtain a piece of the Triad. You blew that but you can still at least try to go out with some momentum. You can try and change people’s minds because right now all they see is a future wash out. Do you want to be the only guy in the Trials who didn’t win a match or do you want to be the guy who decided to leave it all on the line and do whatever it takes to win.”
“But cheating?”
“Look Patriot I didn’t get to where I am today because I played by the rules all the time and I promise you this, no one who ever mattered in this life did so without fucking over someone along the way. That is not hyperbole, that is fact. You think your friend Vhodka is squeaky clean? Or LCP? Helena? Matt Knox? Thirsteus Duke? Strafford? There isn’t a single competitor in this event that hasn’t or isn’t willing to do whatever it takes to secure the W and it’s long past time that you do the same thing.”
“I don’t know if I can Chet.”
“You can. And you will. You can’t afford not to. Like I said already, you blew your shot of accomplishing anything in the Bravery trials but going out with a win will show the Powers That Be that you aren’t a quitter. That you, to borrow another sports idiom, play until the whistle blows. It will certainly help you when it comes time to re-up for the Bravery trials. Or do you want to go out on your back watching someone else win? Again?”
“I don’t want that.”
“Then you need to trust me and start doing things differently. Trust me Patriot. Just like George Washington, I can never tell a lie.”
“I believe you Chet. And I believe in you. From day one I have believed that you were the person who would take me to the top. None of that has changed as far as I’m concerned even if you are upset with me and think I’ve failed you and everyone else but I still believe in you and if this is what needs to be done then I guess…”
Suddenly the doors to the church swing open with a loud thud as the doors smash into the walls now behind them as a very angry, very well armed woman steps out of the shadows and into the light.
“YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!”
For there, standing in the doorway like an Angel sent down from the Heavens above stands MERICA’s teammate Vhodka Black, with a machete in her hand.
“Step aside MERICA. I’m doing this for you and for AMERICA!!!”
And with that Vhodka charges down the aisle towards Chet, Machete high in the air ready to inflict maximum damage. Chet’s eyes widen as he casually takes a step backwards. He opens the bible placed on the altar and then smashes a button that for some reason was placed inside of it. Just as he does this the building begins to shake violently which brings MERICA to his feet and Vhodka to a screeching halt only feet away from her intended victim. Dust and debris start to fall from the ceiling as the altar suddenly starts to pull away from the rest of the building and climb the sky as both Vhokda and MERICA look on in astonishment.
“Sorry Vhodka but Chet Dakota does not put aggressive hands on a woman.” Chet shouts as he looks down at the two wrestlers below him.
“Chet…where will I find you?” MERICA shouts up at his mentor.
“Don’t worry Patriot. I’ll find you.”
Vhokda looks up at Chet and mimics a throat slashing gesture with the machete to Chet as he flies away off into the distance on his flying altar.
“Are you ok MERICA?”
“Yes Vhodka I’m fine thank you. How did you know I was here?”
“I used the find your phone app.”
“But I don’t have a phone.”
“I used it on Chet’s phone.”
“Ahhhh, I see. But why?”
“Because MERICA, Chet has got to know. I know he’s your mentor and you like the guy but he’s the worst. The literal worst. No one likes him and I’m pretty sure he’s not a 50 time World Champion, among other outlandish claims that he makes. You can do better than him, MERICA. I know you can.”
“Maybe Vhodka. Maybe but he found me. He literally found me off the streets and offered to mentor me. I feel like I owe it to him to see this through.”
“I understand that friend. And I think your loyalty is something to be commended but take it from me. Someone who's been around this industry for a while. Most people are trash and not to be trusted. Chet is definitely one of those people. I’ll have your back as much as I can but keep your eyes open and your ears perked up.”
“Will do. Thanks Vhodka. You’ve been a real friend since day 1. Even before we were drafted to be on the same team. And you’ve stuck with me despite my repeated disappointments. I appreciate you.”
“Don’t mention it MERICA. You’re one of the good ones.” Vodka says as he pats MERICA on the back and then heads back out of the church, kindly closing the doors behind her as she leaves.
~~~~~
“Am I one of the good ones? Vhodka seems to think so and I genuinely believe that she believes it but what exactly does that mean? Why am I good? Is it because I try and keep my nose clean and not make waves? Is it because I take my mom to church every Sunday and then volunteer at the local soup kitchen? Is it because I try to adhere to a specific code both inside and outside of the ring? Maybe it’s one of those things, maybe it’s a combination of them or maybe it’s none of them. I suppose it doesn’t really matter though does it? In the context of these trials being one of the good ones means being the worst wrestler in this event. Maybe Chet is right. Maybe it is time for a change and maybe that change starts with my opponents this week.
Thaddeus Duke has accomplished so much at such a young age it truly is remarkable. I would say he’s someone to be envied but I don’t want his already enormous head to swell anymore lest he find himself floating away like Chet just did. I joke but i’m also serious. Thaddeus calls himself a Young Lion but he is also a Young Legend and he knows it and it is that arrogance that will ultimately be his undoing. If not by me then by someone like…
Matt Knox. As I said before Matt has been a pretty solid dude with me since I showed up on the scene, I really don’t have anything bad to say about the guy as much as I wished I could. Like Thad he too is extremely accomplished. He’s beat some of the very best this business has to offer, past and present.I’ve often gone into these matches telling everyone what my plan is and as you can see from the results it hasn’t worked out for me one bit so instead I’m just going to say this. As much as I hate to admit it Chet made a compelling case as to why I need to change things up and perhaps the thin red line that I've so far stayed on the right side of.
Maybe being one of the good ones is another way of saying you’re not very good at all.
OOC: Word count 2250 on the nose