Post by L.C. Pinkston on Aug 20, 2023 17:28:46 GMT -5
Narrator:
You can’t be serious? All of that… for this? If you are watching this, congratulations. You’ve broken the man. The man with all the confidence in the world. Broken. Battered. Beaten.
“Shut up.” The usually boisterous Lewis meekly said as he was in the fetal position on the ground. His hands covering his eyes that were bloodshot but not for the usual reason.
Narrator:
This is what the quest for the Triad has done. It’s taken Lewis and made… this. This abomination.
“Tim Roth is pretty cool.” The breaking in Lewis’ voice was barely noticeable.
Narrator:
He was okay in She Hulk. Moving past that. Through everything that has happened, the ups and the downs. Lewis has stood firmly on the belief that it was his irreverence that would catapult him to the forefront of the trials. Yet somehow, some way, he was thwarted by morons who would rather rip off others than stand on their own feet.
“I never said that.” Lewis sits up and wipes his cheeks and rubs his eyes. “I said Dollar store brand. It’s not a complete rip off but it has nothing to do with anything.”
Narrator:
Lewis please, you’re not in the right headspace to handle this right now. Leave it to me.
Lewis sits up and looks a bit wobbly. “Maybe if the Dramamine didn’t wear off already.” His skin is a bit jaundice and his eyes emptier than usual.
Narrator:
Lewis that wasn’t Damamaine, it was a sugar pill.
“YOU GAVE ME THE PLACEBO!” Absolutely furious Lewis slams his fist onto the steel floor. “You know I don’t do well on boats.”
Narrator:
Please, you go dead sick on the log ride at Cedar Point.
“That was from my fear of falling!” Lewis stands up and is shaky. He uses the wall to steady himself.
Narrator:
You mean fear of heights?
“What?” Lewis looks around with a ‘Look at this guy’ expression. “No. A fear of falling is much more prudent. A fear of heights is just a fear that you’d fall from there and the consequences of that fall.”
Narrator:
That makes sense I guess.
“Well no shit Sherlock. Look at who you’re talking to.” Lewis closes his eyes and shakes his head.
Narrator:
Same thing could be said about you.
“Touché.” Lewis wags a finger. “What do you think?” Lewis points to the corner.
“I dunno man.”
A voice echoes from the darkened corner. “Well don’t be shy.” Lewis waves at the corner. “Let’s all see you in all your glory.”
A few moments of shuffling and out from the dark corner is Steven Seagal. “Why am I on this boat?”
Narrator:
Holy shit I didn’t even see him there!
“Right? This room is much bigger than we should expect.” Lewis holds both arms out and spins. He somehow causes himself to get dizzier than you’d expect from a few twirls. “Whoa.”
“This is the idiot that got me here?” Steven says in a gruff tone.
“Yeah Steve! I got you here.” Lewis points towards the action movie star. “You are here to prove a point. What point is that? Fear isn’t in my vocabulary. Sure the last time we met I may have been slightly askew, but then I thought about it and you’re just a man.”
Narrator:
Here we go.
“Hush.” Lewis holds his index finger to his lips. “If you say it again people will think that was some kind of dig.” Lewis curls his bottom lip. “Okay it totally was a dig. Right Wolf? It’s okay it went over your head, mostly because you were too busy fucking me over to realize that you could’ve been where ever you wanted but alas you’re too loyal to someone that used you.”
Narrator:
Lewis careful.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Lewis shakes his head. “It’s actually one of the very few admirable things about you. But how much fight do you have left? Or are you just going to crash and burn as fast as that too?”
Narrator:
That was uncalled for.
“Right, sorry I was pulling from my Stratford pile, I don’t have any clue how that got in the Wolf sheet.” Lewis looks right at the camera and shrugs. “Oh well. You see, I'm not afraid of anyone. Anything. Living or Dead. The occult can bring demons to my bed and I wouldn’t blink. Voodoo priests could…”
Narrator:
Stop. You don’t fuck with Voodoo. Voodoo is real.
“You’re right, mah bad.” Lewis uses the back of his hand to fake wipe away sweat from his forehead. “Where was I? Right loyalty, blah blah blah. A dig no one understands but me. Seems like I’m hitting all my marks so far. Wut do you think?” Lewis once again points to the dark corner.
“Look man I’ll give you…”
Lewis interrupts before the man can finish. “Just say the line.”
“Ugh fine.” The voice in the corner grumbles for a moment. “mindfreak…” Out from the corner stills Criss Angel, holding Lewis’ wallet. “Here.”
Criss tosses the wallet towards Lewis. He bobbles it for a moment before triumphantly holding it above his head like a piece of the Tri-Force. “KOBE!”
Narrator:
Two things. One that’s for when you shoot something into a round receptacle and second…. What the fuck is he doing here?
“Huh?” Lewis looks at Steven and Criss puzzled.
Narrator:
Yeah it seems like it’s out of left field.
“Ohhhhhhhh.” Lewis simply nods. “I’ll get to it I promise but for now let us concentrate on Lach.” One big goofy smile and wave.
“Who are you waving to?” Asked Criss.
“Lachlan.” Lewis responds abruptly. “He’s one of the two people I’m fighting this week.”
“You don’t look like much of a fighter. You know, with how you generally look.” Steven said while producing a carrot from his jacket pocket.
“Yeah well neither do you. Hell you didn’t even when you were at the height of your fame. Leave the bashing to me, yeah?” Lewis waves his backhand at Steven. “Where was I before I was so rudely interrupted? Ah yes, Lach and his demon in his head. Everyone needs to realize that you don’t actually have to stay at the hotel when the room is offered, right? It’s not that difficult to notice when shit is about to go sideways. Everyone that steps foot in there wouldn’t last a minute in a horror movie. At best all of you would be the second to die.”
Narrator:
“I know.” A resigned sigh from Lewis. “It’s as if all the head trauma we as wrestlers have face have given some of you outwardly noticeable CTE. Is that why you have so many abs Lach? One for each brain cell you have left?”
Narrator:
I think that’s just a funny coincidence.
“Maybe, maybe not. The fact stands.” Lewis takes a deep breath and shakes out his hands. “See I’ve seen Lach around, back when I was Running PWE, so I know what they bring to the table. I know Wolf from when I was HR in Fight and they were ‘loosely’ associated with it. And yes that means they know what they can expect from me as well.”
“Kinda.” Criss finishes the thought.
“Oi! That was my line!” Lewis bellows towards him but he quickly composes himself. “Kinda. You see again I must stress this, I’m not the same Lewis that you’ve all known for so long. I’ve grown. I’ve adapted to my situations. Both of you have stayed rather… the same. Sure you slapped a spooky twist on yourself Lach and Wolf you’ve done…. Well you’ve got a new X handle. So good on you.”
Narrator:
Two of the lost different people, still somehow staying the same.
“Yup. And it makes sense why you’ve both stayed in your bubbles. But ya boi Lewis is about to send both of you back to them with a quick blow.”
Narrator:
Okay can we finally get to why Criss and Steven are here?
“What? Oh yeah right.” Lewis claps his hands and both men vanish.
Narrator:
Wait what just happened?
“You don’t get it so I guess I need to have the subtlety of a jackhammer on a pane of glass” Lewis leans against the cold steel wall and slides down onto his ass. “They were just figments of my imagination. Steering me towards the right decision. Towards the right direction.”
Narrator:
But they seemed so real and malleable.
“Right? It’s almost as if I created them.” A quick whistle from Lewis and both men reappear. He claps and they both vanish again. “Let’s think about this logically. How many parks have an oak door?”
Narrator:
Well none come to mind.
“Sure, a gate of some sort, but a door? Nah. All of it was carefully crafted in my head in order to do what exactly?” Lewis holds out both hands and waits for a response, when he doesn’t receive one he continues. “Show how my preparation is vastly different. That I always take a more tactile approach because I’m not as skilled as others in terms of wrestling.”
Narrator:
We all know that.
“And yet somehow I always manage to come out unscathed. Why is that?” Again Lewis waits but doesn’t get a response. “I’m basically a magician in the ring. My ability, or lack thereof, doesn’t detract from what is always my main focus. Attempting to win. So when Criss stole my wallet. I was given a decision and I chose the Triad.”
Narrator:
And that explains the…
“The Cave. Yes. Again apparently I have to follow A B C’s of all of this. It’s okay tho. Here I am sitting in reality talking to…”
Narrator:
Yourself.
“And people still miss the point. It’s okay, from here on in.” Lewis pulls himself up to his feet and stands At attention. “My feet will be firmly planted within the confines of reality. Where the droll and boring reign supreme. If all else fails I’ll try and try again.”
There was a knock on the door. The sound echoed in the room. Lewis brushes himself off and slowly opens the door. Standing there with her hands behind her back is Vhodka Black. “Hey Lew.”
“Sup?” Lewis said while trying to shut the door.
“Well I felt bad about clinching our team.” She looks to her left and smiles to herself. “But I got you something to show how proud of you and how far you’ve come.”
“Heh. Cum.” Lewis blankly stares at Vhodka, as she slaps him upside the head.
“Never fails. Anyways here you go.” Vhodka hands Lewis a Brand New Switch OLED. He looks it over and smiles.
“Thanks.” Lewis holds out a fist for a bump and Vhodka does so. She pats him on the shoulder and walks away. We finally get a view outside the door.
The sprawling ocean in every direction. Lewis is on the boat quickly approaching the Bermuda Triangle. Lewis walks up to the handrail and leans over it.
“With this Switch I have nothing left to fight for.”
He stares at it and nods to himself.
He lets go of the Switch.
It falls all the way down to the ocean below. With a small splash.
“Then again.”
Lewis takes a deep breath.
“Maybe I’m not done fighting.”
Fade.
You can’t be serious? All of that… for this? If you are watching this, congratulations. You’ve broken the man. The man with all the confidence in the world. Broken. Battered. Beaten.
“Shut up.” The usually boisterous Lewis meekly said as he was in the fetal position on the ground. His hands covering his eyes that were bloodshot but not for the usual reason.
Narrator:
This is what the quest for the Triad has done. It’s taken Lewis and made… this. This abomination.
“Tim Roth is pretty cool.” The breaking in Lewis’ voice was barely noticeable.
Narrator:
He was okay in She Hulk. Moving past that. Through everything that has happened, the ups and the downs. Lewis has stood firmly on the belief that it was his irreverence that would catapult him to the forefront of the trials. Yet somehow, some way, he was thwarted by morons who would rather rip off others than stand on their own feet.
“I never said that.” Lewis sits up and wipes his cheeks and rubs his eyes. “I said Dollar store brand. It’s not a complete rip off but it has nothing to do with anything.”
Narrator:
Lewis please, you’re not in the right headspace to handle this right now. Leave it to me.
Lewis sits up and looks a bit wobbly. “Maybe if the Dramamine didn’t wear off already.” His skin is a bit jaundice and his eyes emptier than usual.
Narrator:
Lewis that wasn’t Damamaine, it was a sugar pill.
“YOU GAVE ME THE PLACEBO!” Absolutely furious Lewis slams his fist onto the steel floor. “You know I don’t do well on boats.”
Narrator:
Please, you go dead sick on the log ride at Cedar Point.
“That was from my fear of falling!” Lewis stands up and is shaky. He uses the wall to steady himself.
Narrator:
You mean fear of heights?
“What?” Lewis looks around with a ‘Look at this guy’ expression. “No. A fear of falling is much more prudent. A fear of heights is just a fear that you’d fall from there and the consequences of that fall.”
Narrator:
That makes sense I guess.
“Well no shit Sherlock. Look at who you’re talking to.” Lewis closes his eyes and shakes his head.
Narrator:
Same thing could be said about you.
“Touché.” Lewis wags a finger. “What do you think?” Lewis points to the corner.
“I dunno man.”
A voice echoes from the darkened corner. “Well don’t be shy.” Lewis waves at the corner. “Let’s all see you in all your glory.”
A few moments of shuffling and out from the dark corner is Steven Seagal. “Why am I on this boat?”
Narrator:
Holy shit I didn’t even see him there!
“Right? This room is much bigger than we should expect.” Lewis holds both arms out and spins. He somehow causes himself to get dizzier than you’d expect from a few twirls. “Whoa.”
“This is the idiot that got me here?” Steven says in a gruff tone.
“Yeah Steve! I got you here.” Lewis points towards the action movie star. “You are here to prove a point. What point is that? Fear isn’t in my vocabulary. Sure the last time we met I may have been slightly askew, but then I thought about it and you’re just a man.”
Narrator:
Here we go.
“Hush.” Lewis holds his index finger to his lips. “If you say it again people will think that was some kind of dig.” Lewis curls his bottom lip. “Okay it totally was a dig. Right Wolf? It’s okay it went over your head, mostly because you were too busy fucking me over to realize that you could’ve been where ever you wanted but alas you’re too loyal to someone that used you.”
Narrator:
Lewis careful.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Lewis shakes his head. “It’s actually one of the very few admirable things about you. But how much fight do you have left? Or are you just going to crash and burn as fast as that too?”
Narrator:
That was uncalled for.
“Right, sorry I was pulling from my Stratford pile, I don’t have any clue how that got in the Wolf sheet.” Lewis looks right at the camera and shrugs. “Oh well. You see, I'm not afraid of anyone. Anything. Living or Dead. The occult can bring demons to my bed and I wouldn’t blink. Voodoo priests could…”
Narrator:
Stop. You don’t fuck with Voodoo. Voodoo is real.
“You’re right, mah bad.” Lewis uses the back of his hand to fake wipe away sweat from his forehead. “Where was I? Right loyalty, blah blah blah. A dig no one understands but me. Seems like I’m hitting all my marks so far. Wut do you think?” Lewis once again points to the dark corner.
“Look man I’ll give you…”
Lewis interrupts before the man can finish. “Just say the line.”
“Ugh fine.” The voice in the corner grumbles for a moment. “mindfreak…” Out from the corner stills Criss Angel, holding Lewis’ wallet. “Here.”
Criss tosses the wallet towards Lewis. He bobbles it for a moment before triumphantly holding it above his head like a piece of the Tri-Force. “KOBE!”
Narrator:
Two things. One that’s for when you shoot something into a round receptacle and second…. What the fuck is he doing here?
“Huh?” Lewis looks at Steven and Criss puzzled.
Narrator:
Yeah it seems like it’s out of left field.
“Ohhhhhhhh.” Lewis simply nods. “I’ll get to it I promise but for now let us concentrate on Lach.” One big goofy smile and wave.
“Who are you waving to?” Asked Criss.
“Lachlan.” Lewis responds abruptly. “He’s one of the two people I’m fighting this week.”
“You don’t look like much of a fighter. You know, with how you generally look.” Steven said while producing a carrot from his jacket pocket.
“Yeah well neither do you. Hell you didn’t even when you were at the height of your fame. Leave the bashing to me, yeah?” Lewis waves his backhand at Steven. “Where was I before I was so rudely interrupted? Ah yes, Lach and his demon in his head. Everyone needs to realize that you don’t actually have to stay at the hotel when the room is offered, right? It’s not that difficult to notice when shit is about to go sideways. Everyone that steps foot in there wouldn’t last a minute in a horror movie. At best all of you would be the second to die.”
Narrator:
Skirting on a line there Lew.
“I know.” A resigned sigh from Lewis. “It’s as if all the head trauma we as wrestlers have face have given some of you outwardly noticeable CTE. Is that why you have so many abs Lach? One for each brain cell you have left?”
Narrator:
I think that’s just a funny coincidence.
“Maybe, maybe not. The fact stands.” Lewis takes a deep breath and shakes out his hands. “See I’ve seen Lach around, back when I was Running PWE, so I know what they bring to the table. I know Wolf from when I was HR in Fight and they were ‘loosely’ associated with it. And yes that means they know what they can expect from me as well.”
“Kinda.” Criss finishes the thought.
“Oi! That was my line!” Lewis bellows towards him but he quickly composes himself. “Kinda. You see again I must stress this, I’m not the same Lewis that you’ve all known for so long. I’ve grown. I’ve adapted to my situations. Both of you have stayed rather… the same. Sure you slapped a spooky twist on yourself Lach and Wolf you’ve done…. Well you’ve got a new X handle. So good on you.”
Narrator:
Two of the lost different people, still somehow staying the same.
“Yup. And it makes sense why you’ve both stayed in your bubbles. But ya boi Lewis is about to send both of you back to them with a quick blow.”
Narrator:
Okay can we finally get to why Criss and Steven are here?
“What? Oh yeah right.” Lewis claps his hands and both men vanish.
Narrator:
Wait what just happened?
“You don’t get it so I guess I need to have the subtlety of a jackhammer on a pane of glass” Lewis leans against the cold steel wall and slides down onto his ass. “They were just figments of my imagination. Steering me towards the right decision. Towards the right direction.”
Narrator:
But they seemed so real and malleable.
“Right? It’s almost as if I created them.” A quick whistle from Lewis and both men reappear. He claps and they both vanish again. “Let’s think about this logically. How many parks have an oak door?”
Narrator:
Well none come to mind.
“Sure, a gate of some sort, but a door? Nah. All of it was carefully crafted in my head in order to do what exactly?” Lewis holds out both hands and waits for a response, when he doesn’t receive one he continues. “Show how my preparation is vastly different. That I always take a more tactile approach because I’m not as skilled as others in terms of wrestling.”
Narrator:
We all know that.
“And yet somehow I always manage to come out unscathed. Why is that?” Again Lewis waits but doesn’t get a response. “I’m basically a magician in the ring. My ability, or lack thereof, doesn’t detract from what is always my main focus. Attempting to win. So when Criss stole my wallet. I was given a decision and I chose the Triad.”
Narrator:
And that explains the…
“The Cave. Yes. Again apparently I have to follow A B C’s of all of this. It’s okay tho. Here I am sitting in reality talking to…”
Narrator:
Yourself.
“And people still miss the point. It’s okay, from here on in.” Lewis pulls himself up to his feet and stands At attention. “My feet will be firmly planted within the confines of reality. Where the droll and boring reign supreme. If all else fails I’ll try and try again.”
There was a knock on the door. The sound echoed in the room. Lewis brushes himself off and slowly opens the door. Standing there with her hands behind her back is Vhodka Black. “Hey Lew.”
“Sup?” Lewis said while trying to shut the door.
“Well I felt bad about clinching our team.” She looks to her left and smiles to herself. “But I got you something to show how proud of you and how far you’ve come.”
“Heh. Cum.” Lewis blankly stares at Vhodka, as she slaps him upside the head.
“Never fails. Anyways here you go.” Vhodka hands Lewis a Brand New Switch OLED. He looks it over and smiles.
“Thanks.” Lewis holds out a fist for a bump and Vhodka does so. She pats him on the shoulder and walks away. We finally get a view outside the door.
The sprawling ocean in every direction. Lewis is on the boat quickly approaching the Bermuda Triangle. Lewis walks up to the handrail and leans over it.
“With this Switch I have nothing left to fight for.”
He stares at it and nods to himself.
He lets go of the Switch.
It falls all the way down to the ocean below. With a small splash.
“Then again.”
Lewis takes a deep breath.
“Maybe I’m not done fighting.”
Fade.