Gumbo the Elephant

Welsh staggers and stumbles around the streets of whatever city this is. A tiny rain cloud follows him like you’d see in a cartoon. It starts to rain on him. He barges into a door and ducks into a small electronics store. Kinda like a Radio Shack but definitely not a Radio Shack. Maybe like a Radio Shak.

It’s dark. But he doesn’t feel alone.

He stumbles into a chair set up for spectators...he knocks someone over.

“Oh damn, my bad.”

He helps them up but it’s a mannequin. Shocked, he drops the mannequin and staggers back. He looks up and sees a banner that reads “Sharper Family Reunion.”

His brow furrows. Who are the Sharpers and why are they having a family reunion inside a Radio Sha(c)k and...why are all the chairs filled with creepy mannequins??

A familiar tune picks up. A light fades out revealing a stage and a portly man with his back to the ‘family’ in attendance. Welsh’s eyes shift from side to side, confused anxiety the theme embedded within them.

I love myself
I want you to love me
When I feel down
I want you above me
I search myself
I want you to find me
I forget myself
I want you to remind me

The fellow spins around. He’s balding and has an untamed beard. He’s wearing a shirt that reads, “FBI – Female Booby Inspector.” He starts dancing as a screen behind him fires up. It shows him sitting behind a keyboard logging into an account under the name “Brady Sharper.”

I don't want anybody else
When I think about you
I tweet myself
Oh, I don't want anybody else
Oh no, oh no, oh no

As ‘Brady Sharper’ he sends a tweet to ‘Lana Sharper.’ He then logs out. The scene cuts and he’s in the same chair, this time with a red wig on. He logs into the ‘Lana Sharper’ account and replies back to ‘Brady Sharper’.

You're the one who makes me come runnin'
You're the sun who makes me shine
When you're around, I'm always laughin'
I want to make you mine

The man spins around, nearly tripping over the mic cord. He keeps his footing. The screens switches showing him behind the keyboard wearing glasses and a short, green colored wig. He logs into the account ‘Crazy Daisy Sharper’ and replies to both Brady and Lana.

I close my eyes
And see you before me
Think I would die
If you were to ignore me
A fool could see
Just how much I adore you
I'd get down on my knees
I'd do anything for you

The man points at his mannequins. A light shines on one that looks like Brady Sharper. Then it shifts to another that looks like Lana Sharper. And, finally, it shines on a green haired mannequin resembling Crazy Daisy. The man shakes his hips and spins around. The screen shifts showing him dressed up in a bear outfit and logging into ‘Grizzly Sharper.’

I don't want anybody else
When I think about you
I touch myself
Oh, I don't want anybody else
Oh no, oh no, oh no, yeah

The screen splits and splits and splits...multiplies several times over until we have numerous videos of the singing man dressed in different outfits logging into different character twitter accounts and replying, retweeting his other characters. The spot light shifts around from chair to chair...each seat filled with a member of his cast of characters.

I tweet myself
I want you to tweet me
When I feel down
I want you above me
I search myself
I want you to find me
I tweet myself
I want you to tweet me

Overcome with shock and horror...Welsh falls back, tripping over some mannequins aka Sharper family members. The song picks up and the dancing man hops and skips around, really belting out the tunes. Welsh gets to his feet and sprints out of the store, diving head first into the door and ramming his way through it and back outside. His body tumbling until it comes to rest in the middle of a sidewalk.

He sits, speechless. A good Samaritan walks by and hands him a dollar bill. Welsh takes it and stares off at nothing in particular.