Post by MW on Jan 15, 2024 11:50:11 GMT -5
Marcus Welsh finds himself standing in the backyard of a lakeside estate. His eyes quickly locate the object of his desire. Adi Gold looks out across the lake on this dying afternoon. The sun provides a golden reflection upon pro wrestling's most Goldgeous personality.
She’s never looked better.
Welsh grips some flowers and a paper bag in his hand and strides forward.
“Hold on there, cowboy,” A familiar voice shouts out as a hand presses into Welsh’s chest.
“Billy Zane?” Welsh looks up at the famous actor and close, personal friend of Adi Gold.
“My friends call me Billy Z or the Z Man…”
“Oh, okay, Z…”
“But you can call me Billy Zane.”
Zane’s stern gaze serves as a warning to Welsh, even if the lavender hair attempts to cover his eyes with each gust of wind that wafts between them.
“Look…”
“Where have you been? Huh? WHERE!” Billy’s voice shrills.
“I got lost. Confused. I…I still am, I just know that…”
“You just up and vanished on us, Marcus! You know what it’s been like without you? Do you know what this absence has done to her…to us?”
“It’s only been like 4 days, Billy Zane.”
“And yet,” he stares off, fighting back emotion, “it feels like a lifetime.”
“Can I just go see Adi, please? I need to talk to her.”
“You’re not gonna leave her again, are you? Abandon her on some sinking ship like the coward that you are!”
“Uh, no, that’s something you did.”
“Oh, please,” Billy Zane folds his arms, “That was so last century. You just love digging up the past, don’t you? It’s always the mind games with you, isn’t it?”
Welsh tries very hard to keep his composure, “Billy Zane. Can I just go speak to Adi. Please.”
Billy Zane studies Welsh’s face. He can tell he’s speaking from the heart, “What have you got in there?” He nods toward the flowers and paper bag.
“Well, these are obviously flowers. Inside this bag, I have a cheeseburger and some fries…from…”
Billy Zane reaches into the bag, inspecting. He grabs a fry and eats it. “Mmm,” he nods, grabbing another one and eating it. He takes the entire bag of fries, “I’m afraid I’m going to have to confiscate these. The rest is fine. You may see Miss Gold.”
Welsh is like ‘that’s half the meal’ but he lets it go.
“But if I hear so much as a scream, cry, or even a whimper…I’m coming for you.” Billy Zane’s eyes are threatening as his hand tosses another fry into his mouth.
Welsh gets away from Billy Zane as quickly as he can, approaching Adi. She continues to stand on the edge of the lake like an angel. A being too good for this cruel world.
Welsh pauses, struck by Adi. The beauty of the image before him.
He finally works up the courage to speak, “Adi.”
“Please Marcus…” Adi speaks interrupting Marcus. “You need this. You need… help. I mean sure. Of course we could go into the bedroom and tear each others clothes off with our teeth…”
Marcus nods with a smirk.
“And sure we did buy that chocolate syrup we planned to lick off our bodies… and try new positions as we watch that pornographic dvd “The Ass Master”...”
“Adi…” Billy Zane says gently nudging Adi in the arm.
“Right… but this isn’t about US. It’s about YOU! This whole idea of you planning an escape from the business you were born to do? Leaving all this behind you. You are wrestling. You are this business… you ARE The TRIAD!”
Welsh thinks about the good times. He thinks about the TRIAD. He almost smiles. Then the bad times come flooding back. Leo embarrassing him at his own place. His team winning without his guidance. And, the elephant. The slipping sand.
“I don’t have it anymore. Plus, the elephant, it keeps…”
Adi gives Marcus a strange look. Billy Zane blurts out, “ELEPHANT?” Marcus feels like an idiot.
“Forget what I just said. The point is…” the gravity he feels weighing him down seems almost melodramatic. “I…ah, nevermind. Can I just stay here with you? You’ve got plenty of money. Just out of the light, away from those leeches that just take and take and take and take and take and take and…”
Adi stops him. “You need to chill. Hey.. look at me.” She makes eye contact with him. “Chill. We are here to help you. Don’t worry about the elephant. Elephants don’t even exist. They are a myth from a Hindu religion.”
Marcus goes to correct her but she continues.
“What IS real is YOU! You are real. And what you can offer to this business, world and business is the realist real of the real. And we ain’t going anywhere until you realize this. Me, Billy...and others. We're all here for you, right now. Ok?”
“Right now? Wait, what is this…what’s going on here, Adi?”
Adi holds Marcus’ hand and walks him into a room where several people are seated in a circle. She and Marcus sit down next to each other. She squeezes his hand as he looks at everyone staring at him. Across from him is a hairy biker in leather. He winks in Marcus’ direction as Billy Zane enters the circle now wearing a black robe, an old white judge wig and swinging a gavel.
“Hear, hear!” Zane yells getting everyone's attention. “Let the intervention BEGIN!!!!” Everybody begins stomping their feet around the circle.
“An intervention?” Welsh stares at Adi, “Is this really necessary?”
Billy Zane slams the gavel into the floor, “Of course it’s necessary, Marcus! You brought a cheeseburger and fries to Adi as a ‘forgive me’ gift…we should be doing an intervention for THAT alone. But…maybe later. Today we are all gathered here because of your morose and depressing behavior. You’re not yourself. You need to get your mojo back.”
Mike Myers steps in and whispers into Billy Zane’s ear. He smiles and nods at everyone and calmly exits.
“Sorry, wrong word. You need to get your groove back.”
Stella enters the room and whispers into Billy Zane’s ear. She then smiles and politely exits.
“Ya know what? You just need to stop being such a pussy!”
Everyone in the room gasps.
“Billy Zane, I think that’s a little harsh. I’m just tired. I…”
Billy Zane slams the gavel several times.
“Let him work, Marcus,” Adi says.
“Okay, close personal friends of Marcus…now is the time to air your grievances with the man to let him know he’s lost his way and needs to stop acting like such a limp dick.”
Welsh leans back. “Okay, now that…”
Adi squeezes his hand, “Let him work, Marcus. He’s a pro.”
Billy Zane surveys the room. Adi, Marcus, and a bunch of hairy, leather clad bikers. He points at one of them, “You. Tell Marcus how you feel…what’s in your heart. Don’t be shy. This is a safe space.”
The biker shifts. And sighs. He extends his arms and opens his hands. He then leans back, folding his arms and lowering his head.
Billy Zane sniffles, “You said it all, man. You said it all.”
Welsh leans into Adi, “Did you get that? I didn’t hear a fuckin thing.”
Adi elbows Marcus, “Be nice, Marcus. He just poured his heart out.”
The gavel slams. “Marcus!” Marcus shoots upright. Billy Zane calms down, “Would you care to respond to what our good man, your close, personal friend just had to say?”
All eyes are on Marcus. He feels like he’s shown up to take an exam for a class he’s never attended. “I…uh…”
The biker stares at Marcus, eyes eager for some form of validation, communication, reconciliation.
“It’s just…”
“Oh come on ya nutless coward! Answer the man!” Billy Zane slams the gavel.
Welsh rears back, “Nutless coward…I think that’s a little…”
Adi leans into Marcus, “He’s just doing his job, Marcus. Calm down. He's a pro.”
“I’m not even sure he’s in the proper attire. He’s a fuckin judge. These things are usually hosted by therapists or psychologists…not a gavel wielding maniac.”
“Marcus, please! Plus that’s my fault.. I forgot to bring the surgeon costume.”
The biker stands up, covers his eyes and runs out of the room, emotionally broken.
Everyone turns, glaring at Welsh.
“See? See what you’ve done?” Billy Zane condemns.
“Billy Zane, I mean this with all sincerity…I haven’t the faintest clue as to what I’ve done.”
Billy Zane slams the gavel, “And that’s the problem, ya dickless douche bag! You go around hurting people’s feelings and when they try and reach out to you, you just ignore them! Block them out! Act as though you can’t hear them!”
“Easy, Billy Zane. I may be something of a pacifist but I have a breaking point.”
“And now you want to quit because you had some ‘little dream’? C’mon you bitch ass loser! Stop crying! Just admit you’re scared! You’re scared that you don’t have it anymore.”
“Adi, what kind of intervention is this?”
Adi tries to calm Billy Zane down.
More gavel slamming, “Why don’t you take that weak ass of yours and join the church of Scientology. Fuckin loser. You’ll never be the booker Zybala is.”
Welsh looks up, “What did he just say?”
“Marcus, please.”
“What the fuck did he just say?”
“Marcus, no!”
Welsh leaps out of his chair. “You’re gonna die for that, Billy Zane!”
Welsh charges, taking Billy Zane down!! He wraps his hands around Billy Zane’s throat, choking him.
“Eck! Ah! Get him off me! He’s a maniac!!”
The leather clad, hairy bikers rush in and pull Marcus off of Billy Zane. Adi drops down, checking on the Titanic star. He’s holding his throat, “Oh my gosh! How could you? I thought you were a professional!”
Welsh pulls away from the bikers, “You went too far, Billy Zane!”
“Marcus…you need to control yourself!” Adi yells.
“Adi…you heard him, he…”
“You’re too unstable. You need professional professional help.”
“I…but, see? I have that passion back, isn’t that…”
“Not like this, Marcus,” Billy Zane buries his face into Adi’s chest, crying. “You’re just going to continue hurting people. Me, the wrestlers, Billy Zane…where does it end, Marcus? Where does it end?!”
Welsh lowers his head. The bikers surrounding him start to dance. “Not now, guys.” They stop.
“One more chance,” Adi stands. “You’ve got one more chance to get your shit together.”
“Anything."
She hands him a business card.
“Happy Endings and Good Times Retreat Place?”
“Yes. It’s for the richest of the rich. Where they go to ‘find themselves’ after a long, excruciating ordeal.”
“You know I’m not into that hippie crap, Adi.”
She gets up in his personal space, staring into his eyes, “It’s this or…it’s over.”
Welsh stares at the business card, “Fuck.”
She’s never looked better.
Welsh grips some flowers and a paper bag in his hand and strides forward.
“Hold on there, cowboy,” A familiar voice shouts out as a hand presses into Welsh’s chest.
“Billy Zane?” Welsh looks up at the famous actor and close, personal friend of Adi Gold.
“My friends call me Billy Z or the Z Man…”
“Oh, okay, Z…”
“But you can call me Billy Zane.”
Zane’s stern gaze serves as a warning to Welsh, even if the lavender hair attempts to cover his eyes with each gust of wind that wafts between them.
“Look…”
“Where have you been? Huh? WHERE!” Billy’s voice shrills.
“I got lost. Confused. I…I still am, I just know that…”
“You just up and vanished on us, Marcus! You know what it’s been like without you? Do you know what this absence has done to her…to us?”
“It’s only been like 4 days, Billy Zane.”
“And yet,” he stares off, fighting back emotion, “it feels like a lifetime.”
“Can I just go see Adi, please? I need to talk to her.”
“You’re not gonna leave her again, are you? Abandon her on some sinking ship like the coward that you are!”
“Uh, no, that’s something you did.”
“Oh, please,” Billy Zane folds his arms, “That was so last century. You just love digging up the past, don’t you? It’s always the mind games with you, isn’t it?”
Welsh tries very hard to keep his composure, “Billy Zane. Can I just go speak to Adi. Please.”
Billy Zane studies Welsh’s face. He can tell he’s speaking from the heart, “What have you got in there?” He nods toward the flowers and paper bag.
“Well, these are obviously flowers. Inside this bag, I have a cheeseburger and some fries…from…”
Billy Zane reaches into the bag, inspecting. He grabs a fry and eats it. “Mmm,” he nods, grabbing another one and eating it. He takes the entire bag of fries, “I’m afraid I’m going to have to confiscate these. The rest is fine. You may see Miss Gold.”
Welsh is like ‘that’s half the meal’ but he lets it go.
“But if I hear so much as a scream, cry, or even a whimper…I’m coming for you.” Billy Zane’s eyes are threatening as his hand tosses another fry into his mouth.
Welsh gets away from Billy Zane as quickly as he can, approaching Adi. She continues to stand on the edge of the lake like an angel. A being too good for this cruel world.
Welsh pauses, struck by Adi. The beauty of the image before him.
He finally works up the courage to speak, “Adi.”
“Please Marcus…” Adi speaks interrupting Marcus. “You need this. You need… help. I mean sure. Of course we could go into the bedroom and tear each others clothes off with our teeth…”
Marcus nods with a smirk.
“And sure we did buy that chocolate syrup we planned to lick off our bodies… and try new positions as we watch that pornographic dvd “The Ass Master”...”
“Adi…” Billy Zane says gently nudging Adi in the arm.
“Right… but this isn’t about US. It’s about YOU! This whole idea of you planning an escape from the business you were born to do? Leaving all this behind you. You are wrestling. You are this business… you ARE The TRIAD!”
Welsh thinks about the good times. He thinks about the TRIAD. He almost smiles. Then the bad times come flooding back. Leo embarrassing him at his own place. His team winning without his guidance. And, the elephant. The slipping sand.
“I don’t have it anymore. Plus, the elephant, it keeps…”
Adi gives Marcus a strange look. Billy Zane blurts out, “ELEPHANT?” Marcus feels like an idiot.
“Forget what I just said. The point is…” the gravity he feels weighing him down seems almost melodramatic. “I…ah, nevermind. Can I just stay here with you? You’ve got plenty of money. Just out of the light, away from those leeches that just take and take and take and take and take and take and…”
Adi stops him. “You need to chill. Hey.. look at me.” She makes eye contact with him. “Chill. We are here to help you. Don’t worry about the elephant. Elephants don’t even exist. They are a myth from a Hindu religion.”
Marcus goes to correct her but she continues.
“What IS real is YOU! You are real. And what you can offer to this business, world and business is the realist real of the real. And we ain’t going anywhere until you realize this. Me, Billy...and others. We're all here for you, right now. Ok?”
“Right now? Wait, what is this…what’s going on here, Adi?”
Adi holds Marcus’ hand and walks him into a room where several people are seated in a circle. She and Marcus sit down next to each other. She squeezes his hand as he looks at everyone staring at him. Across from him is a hairy biker in leather. He winks in Marcus’ direction as Billy Zane enters the circle now wearing a black robe, an old white judge wig and swinging a gavel.
“Hear, hear!” Zane yells getting everyone's attention. “Let the intervention BEGIN!!!!” Everybody begins stomping their feet around the circle.
“An intervention?” Welsh stares at Adi, “Is this really necessary?”
Billy Zane slams the gavel into the floor, “Of course it’s necessary, Marcus! You brought a cheeseburger and fries to Adi as a ‘forgive me’ gift…we should be doing an intervention for THAT alone. But…maybe later. Today we are all gathered here because of your morose and depressing behavior. You’re not yourself. You need to get your mojo back.”
Mike Myers steps in and whispers into Billy Zane’s ear. He smiles and nods at everyone and calmly exits.
“Sorry, wrong word. You need to get your groove back.”
Stella enters the room and whispers into Billy Zane’s ear. She then smiles and politely exits.
“Ya know what? You just need to stop being such a pussy!”
Everyone in the room gasps.
“Billy Zane, I think that’s a little harsh. I’m just tired. I…”
Billy Zane slams the gavel several times.
“Let him work, Marcus,” Adi says.
“Okay, close personal friends of Marcus…now is the time to air your grievances with the man to let him know he’s lost his way and needs to stop acting like such a limp dick.”
Welsh leans back. “Okay, now that…”
Adi squeezes his hand, “Let him work, Marcus. He’s a pro.”
Billy Zane surveys the room. Adi, Marcus, and a bunch of hairy, leather clad bikers. He points at one of them, “You. Tell Marcus how you feel…what’s in your heart. Don’t be shy. This is a safe space.”
The biker shifts. And sighs. He extends his arms and opens his hands. He then leans back, folding his arms and lowering his head.
Billy Zane sniffles, “You said it all, man. You said it all.”
Welsh leans into Adi, “Did you get that? I didn’t hear a fuckin thing.”
Adi elbows Marcus, “Be nice, Marcus. He just poured his heart out.”
The gavel slams. “Marcus!” Marcus shoots upright. Billy Zane calms down, “Would you care to respond to what our good man, your close, personal friend just had to say?”
All eyes are on Marcus. He feels like he’s shown up to take an exam for a class he’s never attended. “I…uh…”
The biker stares at Marcus, eyes eager for some form of validation, communication, reconciliation.
“It’s just…”
“Oh come on ya nutless coward! Answer the man!” Billy Zane slams the gavel.
Welsh rears back, “Nutless coward…I think that’s a little…”
Adi leans into Marcus, “He’s just doing his job, Marcus. Calm down. He's a pro.”
“I’m not even sure he’s in the proper attire. He’s a fuckin judge. These things are usually hosted by therapists or psychologists…not a gavel wielding maniac.”
“Marcus, please! Plus that’s my fault.. I forgot to bring the surgeon costume.”
The biker stands up, covers his eyes and runs out of the room, emotionally broken.
Everyone turns, glaring at Welsh.
“See? See what you’ve done?” Billy Zane condemns.
“Billy Zane, I mean this with all sincerity…I haven’t the faintest clue as to what I’ve done.”
Billy Zane slams the gavel, “And that’s the problem, ya dickless douche bag! You go around hurting people’s feelings and when they try and reach out to you, you just ignore them! Block them out! Act as though you can’t hear them!”
“Easy, Billy Zane. I may be something of a pacifist but I have a breaking point.”
“And now you want to quit because you had some ‘little dream’? C’mon you bitch ass loser! Stop crying! Just admit you’re scared! You’re scared that you don’t have it anymore.”
“Adi, what kind of intervention is this?”
Adi tries to calm Billy Zane down.
More gavel slamming, “Why don’t you take that weak ass of yours and join the church of Scientology. Fuckin loser. You’ll never be the booker Zybala is.”
Welsh looks up, “What did he just say?”
“Marcus, please.”
“What the fuck did he just say?”
“Marcus, no!”
Welsh leaps out of his chair. “You’re gonna die for that, Billy Zane!”
Welsh charges, taking Billy Zane down!! He wraps his hands around Billy Zane’s throat, choking him.
“Eck! Ah! Get him off me! He’s a maniac!!”
The leather clad, hairy bikers rush in and pull Marcus off of Billy Zane. Adi drops down, checking on the Titanic star. He’s holding his throat, “Oh my gosh! How could you? I thought you were a professional!”
Welsh pulls away from the bikers, “You went too far, Billy Zane!”
“Marcus…you need to control yourself!” Adi yells.
“Adi…you heard him, he…”
“You’re too unstable. You need professional professional help.”
“I…but, see? I have that passion back, isn’t that…”
“Not like this, Marcus,” Billy Zane buries his face into Adi’s chest, crying. “You’re just going to continue hurting people. Me, the wrestlers, Billy Zane…where does it end, Marcus? Where does it end?!”
Welsh lowers his head. The bikers surrounding him start to dance. “Not now, guys.” They stop.
“One more chance,” Adi stands. “You’ve got one more chance to get your shit together.”
“Anything."
She hands him a business card.
“Happy Endings and Good Times Retreat Place?”
“Yes. It’s for the richest of the rich. Where they go to ‘find themselves’ after a long, excruciating ordeal.”
“You know I’m not into that hippie crap, Adi.”
She gets up in his personal space, staring into his eyes, “It’s this or…it’s over.”
Welsh stares at the business card, “Fuck.”