Post by MW on Jun 18, 2023 11:31:26 GMT -5
“He’ll be late. I’ve got time.”
This is the 13th time Welsh has uttered these words.
You ever set an appointment and feel really good and happy about it…then the day of the appointment you feel, what would you call it…regret? Well if you have then you know how Welsh feels right now.
The draft is nearing. Welsh has taken notes. So many notes.
And, he’s just about set on who he wants to draft.
So, why does he have to meet with LCP? Because he scheduled the appointment over a week ago and it’s too late to get out of it.
“I’ll appear flaky. He’ll have a chip on his shoulder. Last thing I need is for someone on the other two teams to have extra motivation against me.”
But it’s not THAT bad, right? LCP is a cool guy. The two men can just sit back, knock down a few drinks and discuss the upcoming Trials.
And that’d be all well and good if Marcus Welsh wasn’t balls deep in Zelda; Tears of the Kingdom.
So, yea…you could say he’s preoccupied.
“Yea, he’ll definitely be late. He looks like a slacker. Probably an hour late, maybe two…shit, he may not even show up.” Welsh looks over at the clock, it reads 3:52. “Yea, I’m good. I can knock out a couple of shrines, explore the depths a bit, and might even be able to upgrade some armor. Yea, let’s go.”
He turns on the giant, flat-screen TV inside the spacious living room of this elegant, capacious suite. He grabs his Switch remote, gets it all connected, and takes a seat on the couch.
Welsh is old school. None of that handheld bullshit. He needs his video games on the big screen.
Meanwhile outside Lewis is leaning against the wall, his face illuminated by the Switch OLED with a screen crack running the length of the console. “It’s almost 4, but I’ve got to finish this dungeon.”
Much like Welsh, Lewis to has become enamored with Tears of the Kingdom. However, despite his outward appearance being one-third of the Staff at PWE Lewis has gotten accustomed to showing up early to places and waiting until the exact time to walk in. Usually, it garners a surprise for whomever it is, but usually, it’s the shock that he enjoys most. “Well, no time like the present.”
Lewis hops up to his feet and using the room key that was given to him slides it in and whips the door open. At the same time putting his Switch to sleep and jamming it in his back pocket.
There was a bit of a shock from Marcus but what Lewis did notice was him quickly turning off the TV. “Was…” Lewis takes a step forward as the door shuts behind him. “Was that…Zelda?”
“Uhhh. What?” Marcus quickly hides his controller under the nearest throw pillow on the couch. “No. It was porn. So much porn.”
Lewis has a puzzled look on his face. “Well I’m no prude.” He walks behind the couch and tries to jump over the back. Instead falling flat on his face. Slightly embarrassed Lewis pulls himself up and takes his place on the couch. He kicks his feet up. “So what we talking about? Bang Bros? Bang Bus?” Marcus couldn’t answer before Lewis continued. “Oh you’re into some weird shit huh? It’s okay I don’t kink shame.”
Welsh, an old-school kind of guy, still gets his porn via licensed DVDs and the occasional VHS tape when he’s feeling nostalgic. So, without a basic knowledge of the online market, he blurts out what sounds correct, “Brazzhub, Porners. You know, the big ones.”
LCP’s eyes narrow. Welsh’s response has him confused. Marcus heads into the kitchen…that last shrine puzzle is still on his mind. He opens the door to the fridge and reaches in to grab a couple of beers…but they seem to be stuck together.
“Wait, Ultrahand. That’s it. I need to use Ultrahand to get over the water!”
LCP’s head whips around, he jumps onto his knees staring over the couch into the kitchen. Welsh spins around, “Uh…yea, I gotta ultra hand it to you, Lewis. You’ve come a long way since your stint in the Margarita Mix. Would you like a beer?”
“Pass on the beer.” Lewis turns his back to Marcus. “Oh shit. That’s how I get that last lock. I’ve got to ascend.” Lewis reaches for his Switch but stops himself just as Marcus appears from the kitchen.
“Ascend?” His eyes go slightly wide.
“Uhh——” Lewis, not usually known for thinking on his feet, pulls off a decent response. “Yeah. I can’t wait to Ascend to the top of the Triforce.. I mean ad. Triad draft boards.”
Welsh narrows his eyes. Did he hear what he thinks he heard? He hands LCP a beer and takes a seat next to him. Welsh crosses his legs, his foot facing LCP. LCP looks down at Welsh’s leg and then up at Welsh with an extreme ‘wtf are you doing’ expression.
“Ahem,” Welsh immediately gets up and scrambles across the couch, near the throw pill. He starts to cross his legs but stops, keeping them down. He tosses his arm over the back of the couch and hangs loose. “Well, yea, I’d hope to ascend if were you, too. But not to the Triad. Not yet, you need to ascend these draft boards, Lewis.”
LCP takes a long look at the beer and sets it aside. It’s obvious Lewis didn’t want the beer and took it out of kindness. All we know is he’s very interested to hear what Welsh has to say next.
“I really wish we’d done this sooner. I hate to say it, but my picks are already set and, well…” Welsh trails off. It’s not easy being this blunt with someone that young and eager to succeed. He tries to soften it up a bit, “I mean, last time I saw you wrestle, you only knew three moves, if I recall and this field is the strongest field of…”
Welsh freezes. “Recall. Wait a minute. If I use recall on that giant wheel I can hop onto it and it’ll carry me to the second level!” His hand slides behind the throw pillow for his remote. He remembers LCP is right there and pulls his hand back out. “Aha, I mean…what I mean is, ya know, I mean that I recall you only knowing three moves and…yea, like I said, it’s a strong field so it’s hard to argue your case over, say, Stephen Stratford.” He takes a quick, long pull from his beer hoping he was successful in diverting LCP’s attention.
“Stratford? That bitch?” Lewis quickly turns his head trying to think of something witty, but can’t. His mind is too occupied by hearing recall. “I forgot that was a thing.”
Marcus looks up at Lewis and squints. “Excuse me?”
“What I meant was. I forgot that Stratford was a thing. That guy never shows up when it matters most.” Lewis once again trails off. The rocks were in his way at the temple. “HE’S RIGHT THERE!”
“Who?” Welsh is clearly getting frustrated. By what? Either Lewis is not being coherent or Welsh hasn't logged enough play time on Zelda.
“YUNOBO!” Lewis pulls his Switch out from his pocket and fires it up. “That roley poley looking mother flicker is right there! I build a ramp, send his Cinnabon loving ass up and BLAMMMO! Final lock done.”
Welsh is thrown by all this lingo. But he knows what a Switch looks like. He reaches behind the throw pillow and reveals his controller, turning the TV on. He slides across the couch, looking at LCP’s Switch. “Ohhh, the fat rock guy! He’s back? I haven’t even reached the mountain yet. I just found Kakariko yesterday.”
Several Hours Later
We find ourselves outside Welsh’s sweet. Cheers of triumph sound from within. The door suddenly opens and LCP emerges, Switch OLED in hand. He crushes what’s left of his beer and tosses it over his shoulder back into the suite. We peek in and see it crash into a pile of empty bottles and cans. Welsh appears in the doorway.
“Man, the way you took out that Lynel. I gotta say, impressive.”
“Hey, I do what I do,” LCP stands in the hall, facing Welsh.
“And really appreciate you walking me through a few of those shrines…I gotta say, you’re smarter than I gave you credit for.”
LCP raises his hand for a bro-style handshake. Welsh throws his hand up and nearly misses, but LCP makes the save. They bring it in for a bro hug before LCP breaks away. “And hey, who knows, maybe we can FUSE our talents together and…BOOM,” he creates a fake explosion with his hands as his eyes widen, “Triad.”
“Heyyyooo!!” Welsh points at LCP. He points back before pivoting and striding down the hallway. Welsh heads back inside his room…he hears a slight disturbance…sounds like somebody might have tripped over a tray of empty dishes left outside a room.
Returning to his room, he shuts the door and takes stock of the mess. Empty beer cans and bottles everywhere. A few boxes that used to contain pizza. The Tears of the Kingdom title screen on his TV.
“I can’t remember the last time I had this much fun,” his eyes turn toward a giant picture of himself on the wall. He heads that way and pulls on the frame. It opens up to reveal his secret draft board. He reaches down near the bottom grabs the name ‘LCP’ and moves him up several notches.
“Alright, probably need to get some sleep. Last time I pulled an all night was Christmas Eve 2013 and we all know what happened that year.”
He stumbles into his bedroom and basically flatlines into the mattress.
This is the 13th time Welsh has uttered these words.
You ever set an appointment and feel really good and happy about it…then the day of the appointment you feel, what would you call it…regret? Well if you have then you know how Welsh feels right now.
The draft is nearing. Welsh has taken notes. So many notes.
And, he’s just about set on who he wants to draft.
So, why does he have to meet with LCP? Because he scheduled the appointment over a week ago and it’s too late to get out of it.
“I’ll appear flaky. He’ll have a chip on his shoulder. Last thing I need is for someone on the other two teams to have extra motivation against me.”
But it’s not THAT bad, right? LCP is a cool guy. The two men can just sit back, knock down a few drinks and discuss the upcoming Trials.
And that’d be all well and good if Marcus Welsh wasn’t balls deep in Zelda; Tears of the Kingdom.
So, yea…you could say he’s preoccupied.
“Yea, he’ll definitely be late. He looks like a slacker. Probably an hour late, maybe two…shit, he may not even show up.” Welsh looks over at the clock, it reads 3:52. “Yea, I’m good. I can knock out a couple of shrines, explore the depths a bit, and might even be able to upgrade some armor. Yea, let’s go.”
He turns on the giant, flat-screen TV inside the spacious living room of this elegant, capacious suite. He grabs his Switch remote, gets it all connected, and takes a seat on the couch.
Welsh is old school. None of that handheld bullshit. He needs his video games on the big screen.
Meanwhile outside Lewis is leaning against the wall, his face illuminated by the Switch OLED with a screen crack running the length of the console. “It’s almost 4, but I’ve got to finish this dungeon.”
Much like Welsh, Lewis to has become enamored with Tears of the Kingdom. However, despite his outward appearance being one-third of the Staff at PWE Lewis has gotten accustomed to showing up early to places and waiting until the exact time to walk in. Usually, it garners a surprise for whomever it is, but usually, it’s the shock that he enjoys most. “Well, no time like the present.”
Lewis hops up to his feet and using the room key that was given to him slides it in and whips the door open. At the same time putting his Switch to sleep and jamming it in his back pocket.
There was a bit of a shock from Marcus but what Lewis did notice was him quickly turning off the TV. “Was…” Lewis takes a step forward as the door shuts behind him. “Was that…Zelda?”
“Uhhh. What?” Marcus quickly hides his controller under the nearest throw pillow on the couch. “No. It was porn. So much porn.”
Lewis has a puzzled look on his face. “Well I’m no prude.” He walks behind the couch and tries to jump over the back. Instead falling flat on his face. Slightly embarrassed Lewis pulls himself up and takes his place on the couch. He kicks his feet up. “So what we talking about? Bang Bros? Bang Bus?” Marcus couldn’t answer before Lewis continued. “Oh you’re into some weird shit huh? It’s okay I don’t kink shame.”
Welsh, an old-school kind of guy, still gets his porn via licensed DVDs and the occasional VHS tape when he’s feeling nostalgic. So, without a basic knowledge of the online market, he blurts out what sounds correct, “Brazzhub, Porners. You know, the big ones.”
LCP’s eyes narrow. Welsh’s response has him confused. Marcus heads into the kitchen…that last shrine puzzle is still on his mind. He opens the door to the fridge and reaches in to grab a couple of beers…but they seem to be stuck together.
“Wait, Ultrahand. That’s it. I need to use Ultrahand to get over the water!”
LCP’s head whips around, he jumps onto his knees staring over the couch into the kitchen. Welsh spins around, “Uh…yea, I gotta ultra hand it to you, Lewis. You’ve come a long way since your stint in the Margarita Mix. Would you like a beer?”
“Pass on the beer.” Lewis turns his back to Marcus. “Oh shit. That’s how I get that last lock. I’ve got to ascend.” Lewis reaches for his Switch but stops himself just as Marcus appears from the kitchen.
“Ascend?” His eyes go slightly wide.
“Uhh——” Lewis, not usually known for thinking on his feet, pulls off a decent response. “Yeah. I can’t wait to Ascend to the top of the Triforce.. I mean ad. Triad draft boards.”
Welsh narrows his eyes. Did he hear what he thinks he heard? He hands LCP a beer and takes a seat next to him. Welsh crosses his legs, his foot facing LCP. LCP looks down at Welsh’s leg and then up at Welsh with an extreme ‘wtf are you doing’ expression.
“Ahem,” Welsh immediately gets up and scrambles across the couch, near the throw pill. He starts to cross his legs but stops, keeping them down. He tosses his arm over the back of the couch and hangs loose. “Well, yea, I’d hope to ascend if were you, too. But not to the Triad. Not yet, you need to ascend these draft boards, Lewis.”
LCP takes a long look at the beer and sets it aside. It’s obvious Lewis didn’t want the beer and took it out of kindness. All we know is he’s very interested to hear what Welsh has to say next.
“I really wish we’d done this sooner. I hate to say it, but my picks are already set and, well…” Welsh trails off. It’s not easy being this blunt with someone that young and eager to succeed. He tries to soften it up a bit, “I mean, last time I saw you wrestle, you only knew three moves, if I recall and this field is the strongest field of…”
Welsh freezes. “Recall. Wait a minute. If I use recall on that giant wheel I can hop onto it and it’ll carry me to the second level!” His hand slides behind the throw pillow for his remote. He remembers LCP is right there and pulls his hand back out. “Aha, I mean…what I mean is, ya know, I mean that I recall you only knowing three moves and…yea, like I said, it’s a strong field so it’s hard to argue your case over, say, Stephen Stratford.” He takes a quick, long pull from his beer hoping he was successful in diverting LCP’s attention.
“Stratford? That bitch?” Lewis quickly turns his head trying to think of something witty, but can’t. His mind is too occupied by hearing recall. “I forgot that was a thing.”
Marcus looks up at Lewis and squints. “Excuse me?”
“What I meant was. I forgot that Stratford was a thing. That guy never shows up when it matters most.” Lewis once again trails off. The rocks were in his way at the temple. “HE’S RIGHT THERE!”
“Who?” Welsh is clearly getting frustrated. By what? Either Lewis is not being coherent or Welsh hasn't logged enough play time on Zelda.
“YUNOBO!” Lewis pulls his Switch out from his pocket and fires it up. “That roley poley looking mother flicker is right there! I build a ramp, send his Cinnabon loving ass up and BLAMMMO! Final lock done.”
Welsh is thrown by all this lingo. But he knows what a Switch looks like. He reaches behind the throw pillow and reveals his controller, turning the TV on. He slides across the couch, looking at LCP’s Switch. “Ohhh, the fat rock guy! He’s back? I haven’t even reached the mountain yet. I just found Kakariko yesterday.”
Several Hours Later
We find ourselves outside Welsh’s sweet. Cheers of triumph sound from within. The door suddenly opens and LCP emerges, Switch OLED in hand. He crushes what’s left of his beer and tosses it over his shoulder back into the suite. We peek in and see it crash into a pile of empty bottles and cans. Welsh appears in the doorway.
“Man, the way you took out that Lynel. I gotta say, impressive.”
“Hey, I do what I do,” LCP stands in the hall, facing Welsh.
“And really appreciate you walking me through a few of those shrines…I gotta say, you’re smarter than I gave you credit for.”
LCP raises his hand for a bro-style handshake. Welsh throws his hand up and nearly misses, but LCP makes the save. They bring it in for a bro hug before LCP breaks away. “And hey, who knows, maybe we can FUSE our talents together and…BOOM,” he creates a fake explosion with his hands as his eyes widen, “Triad.”
“Heyyyooo!!” Welsh points at LCP. He points back before pivoting and striding down the hallway. Welsh heads back inside his room…he hears a slight disturbance…sounds like somebody might have tripped over a tray of empty dishes left outside a room.
Returning to his room, he shuts the door and takes stock of the mess. Empty beer cans and bottles everywhere. A few boxes that used to contain pizza. The Tears of the Kingdom title screen on his TV.
“I can’t remember the last time I had this much fun,” his eyes turn toward a giant picture of himself on the wall. He heads that way and pulls on the frame. It opens up to reveal his secret draft board. He reaches down near the bottom grabs the name ‘LCP’ and moves him up several notches.
“Alright, probably need to get some sleep. Last time I pulled an all night was Christmas Eve 2013 and we all know what happened that year.”
He stumbles into his bedroom and basically flatlines into the mattress.